I have a few days to report since I have been M.I.A. from blogging for a couple days. My apologies. Day 4 consisted of more oatmeal and sugar for breakfast and later went back to the bakery for more of those “Dominican corndogs” ($1) and several chinolas ($.45) which left me, as usual, wanting more food and ultimately hungry and only $3 left to me name. Day 5 I broke done and bought salt for about $.50 to add to my eggs which I had for a late breakfast and then had french toast for dinner and a banana ($.10) in between. I was at $2.40 left, beginning to run low on bread and oatmeal and completely out of eggs. There were only 2 days left, but it must be said that I was considerably crankier then normal. I might have lashed out at Kari once or twice. On the plus side everyone noticed me getting skinnier. Day 6 is were it all came undone. I foolishly skipped breakfast and went to Barahona with my Dominican friend Olvis to look at some larimar stones. By the time we got done it was well passed lunch time and I was starving. He and his friend were also quite hungry and had decided to go out to lunch…. I went along. I could say that I was forced to go because I needed to be polite and they wouldn’t understand, but that’s not really true at all. It was my idea to eat lunch and they would have understood, at least a little. We had fried fish and rice and I was the happiest I have ever been in my entire life- wedding day coming in a close 2nd. The food tasted so good and when I was done I was completely full. I was like a weight got lifted of my entire existence. Sounds dramatic but I am being serious. The done side is the meal was about $5 which put me over by almost $3. I tried to live on a modest Budget and I failed. I only had 5 and a half days. However I did learn more then I thought I would.

I am more convinced then ever that even though Jesus promised us the poor would always be among us, that this is not what God wanted for his children. I have never been so hungry for so long and I could have stopped whenever I wanted (in fact I did). The entire time I felt weak, unhappy, unfocused and sick. There is a saying I’ve heard that says giving medicine to a sick person with nothing to eat is like washing your hands and drying them in dirt. I have a much deeper respect for any group that organizes food drives or soup kitchens. Jesus says that God gives us good gifts and when we ask we shall receive. I believe that these people are God’s good gifts to anyone that is hungry. They are bringing the Kingdom in very real ways.

Viv Grigg, a missionary in the slums of the Philippians wrote (if i remember correctly) “the poor need not only the Bread of Life, but bread for life.” I have always believed that it was important for the church to find a balance between evangelistic ministry and the ministry of meeting real physical needs. And while I still believe that nothing could be greater then the message of salvation through Christ, I have a new appreciation for the fact that our love and words are empty as long as their stomachs remain so. I feel more convicted than ever that we should always give food to those who are hungry, no matter what. My guess is that anyone who says that food programs are social programs that enable the poor to stay poor has never gone hungry. How is someone supposed to study or work when they haven’t eaten in 2 days?? Even though I was no where near starvation, the lack of fulfilling meals and proper nutrition was physically and mentally crippling. I could barely focus on anything but my stomach by the end.
Anyone who tried to do this with their families of small kids probably faced challenges with the moral idea of letting their kids go hungry, maybe even wondering if social services might find out and take them away. If parents would not want their kids to go hungry why would God want his children to? In the end I am taking this experience back to where it started. The man who accused us of not understanding what it is really like to be Dominican… well I am still not Dominican but I understand a little better. Since Saturday I have been bringing dinner every night to him and the other guards here at the Guesthouse. It’s not much, but I imagine it is what Jesus might do if he was here in San Juan.